Novelette - "Wednesday's Child"

[lavanya_six]

Here's the start of a little novelette that I've been banging out this afternoon. It plays on the question of "Why doesn't Shinji ever talk about his life before Tokyo-3?".

Two quick question to my readers: is this any good? And has this plot been done before?

TITLE: Wednesday's Child is Full of Woe (or maybe just the shorter "Wednesday's Child"? Or is "Full of Woe" more angsty/better?)

SUMMARY: Shinji Ikari was conceived on a Wednesday, over a lunch of coffee and cigarettes shared between Gendo Ikari and Doctor Ritsuko Akagi.

(Ed. Note: These two scenes are not proofed. They're also flashbacks within the main story.)

 

2011 A.D.

Shinji Ikari was conceived on a Wednesday, over a lunch of coffee and cigarettes shared between Gendo Ikari and Doctor Ritsuko Akagi.

"An idea?" asks the Commander. 

The Chairwoman of E-Project hums an affirmation. On the back of a page torn from a supplementary budgetary report Ritsuko scrawls out, in that tight, cramped handwriting of hers, a smattering of notes and chemical formulas. Gendo Ikari watches as sometimes lover is enraptured by a new idea. He has only seen her do it once or twice before – Doctor Akagi works better alone – but when he has been witness to the spark of an idea in her it fills him with nostalgia. Yui used to do the same thing. Once she even called quits on their lovemaking just so she could sketch out a prototype design for the Eva pilot's A-10 neural interface. 

The vast, empty office looks out onto the Geo-Front. Neither of the co-workers or sometimes lovers cares for the view. Instead they are enraptured by the secret being unraveled one letter at a time on the back of that torn page.

Several minutes pass. At last Ritsuko's pen pauses its frantic scribbling. She pulls her hand away from the page and stares at what she's written, eyes darting back and forth, one corner of her lip held prisoner between her teeth. She still grips the pen in case she misses something in her final evaluation. When she is satisfied that she has, indeed, transcribed the burst of inspiration from inside her head to the paper she sets the pen down. 

"What is it?" asks Gendo, curious.

"I'm think," says Ritsuko quietly, "it's our Third Child."

 

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

 

The Commander adjusts his glasses. "The genome is based on my own DNA."

Fuyutsuki is incredulous. "You let your own flesh be used for this… this thing?" 

"Sub-Commander," says Doctor Akagi in her best professional 'fuck you' voice, "this 'thing' is the key to activating Unit-01 in the event that Rei is unable to pilot. It's a back-up system. Nothing more."

"We needn't activate it unless absolutely necessary," says Commander Ikari. "However, should the need arise, the Third O/S will be capable of synchronizing with its Eva without the need for conditioning, preparation, or even basic training. Doctor Akagi's most optimistic projections pit its baseline synch ratio at over 30 percent." 

"My God."

The blonde brings up the next slide on her presentation. Fuyutsuki recognizes it as a three dimensional rendering of the pattern used in his own Nephilim Project to mentally condition the prototype that became the First Child. "The light and water that make up Rei's mind have been upgraded to something… hardier. With the advance of time our understanding of the human mind has also advanced. Using the MAGI, we can engineer the Third O/S to function with a wider and deeper emotional and empathetic range than Rei Ayanami." 

"You want to make it MORE human? For God's sake, why?!"

On the computer display Dr. Akagi punches up a graph featuring a tortuous series of lines and squiggles. "As indicated from our examination of the Second's mind, a pilot's mental stability has a direct correlation to their ability to interface with the Eva's Core." She turns to the Commanders. "It's as if someone who's losing their sanity suddenly can't get their car to start. The key just won't turn. The mental directly affects the physical even though there is no logical reason for this to happen."   

"In Rei's case," explains Gendo, "her emotional retardation, while making her pliable to the Project's final goals, limits her potential as a pilot. At best she'll function as a support unit to her fellow pilots; as a sniper or other such role."

Ritsuko nods. "The Third O/S, if it is to function suitably, requires a personality that allows it to function independent of NERV's oversight." She clears her throat. "To this end, it will be essential that the Third believe itself to be its own unique being. It will have no concept of its true nature. From the Third's point of view, it… or, rather, 'he'… will remember having a life and a history. The Third O/S will totally believe itself to be an actual human being." 

"Ikari," growls the Sub-Commander.

The Commander stares down Ritsuko. "While I understand the necessity of its conditioning in this manner, what guarantee do we have that the Third will even pilot?"  

"My proposal is that persona of the Third O/S be crafted in such a way that it finds appeal in piloting, even if it comes to despise or outright hate the people that are ordering it to fight. Outside Tokyo-3 and NERV, the Third O/S will feel despondent... lonely. Once it makes its first connection with Unit-01's Core, however, these feelings of isolation will be replaced with a dependency on the validation that piloting Eva gives it. The Third O/S will base its self-image on piloting the Eva, much as we've been engineering the Second Child's ego over the years to be rooted in her piloting performance. However, this plan requires that the Third O/S fixate on one person in particular. This person, dubbed the Controller, will become the source of the Third's validation and self-worth."

The Commander tilts his head to the side. "Intriguing." 

Cautiously, Sub-Commander Fuyutsuki asks, "And who, exactly, do you propose we have the Third fixate on?"

Ritsuko opens her mouth to reply, but, before she can, the Commander steps in. "I will do it," he says. "If I am to trust Unit-01 to this Thing then I must have absolute assurance that it will obey me." He locks eyes with Doctor Akagi. "Can it be done?" 

"Y-yes," she says. "However, this fixation presupposes an emotional connection between the Controller and the Third, something along the lines of teacher and student or uncle and nephew."

"Why not the strongest connection possible?" Gendo asks. 

Fuyutsuki pales. Doctor Akagi is confused. "Strongest?" she repeats. "But what— 

"Father," says Gendo, smirking, "and son." 

Comments

[shanghairain.livejournal.com]

I think it has promise. It's an interesting characterization of Ritsuko (http://xkcd.com/230/, anyone?) but I can't help but feel Gendo's a bit off here--he seems too... gentle, maybe? Possibly just not skeptical enough.

[lavanyasix.livejournal.com]

I see your point about Gendo. So far he's been somewhat at the edge of scenes too as I'm not quite sure what he's doing here.

My main issue is that I'm not *quite* sure what Ritsuko's character arc is supposed to be in this story. Unless the reader gains some insight into her then all I'm writing it technobabble about fake!Shinji.

Just thinking out loud, but maybe the key is in the MAGI triumvirate somehow. The scientist/mother/woman thing that made up Naoko Akagi's personality. If Ritsuko is engineering Shinji, then it's something of a motherly role (if via Doctor Mengele rather than Doctor Seuss). "Ritsuko as a Mother" is the one aspect of the Akagi/MAGI profile that's not explored in canon. It's not done too often in fanfic, either. Off the top of my head I can only think of Eva-R as seriously exploring that territory.

And if this fanfic is acting as a kind of "secret backstory" for cannon Shinji then however Ritsuko views her littlest science fair project needs to fit how she (at least outwardly) reacts to him in canon. There might be some meat in how Ritsuko views the Shinji/Misato relationship, especially since Misato acts as a mother towards him.

Probably should fit more of the Ritsuko/Gendo lover stuff in too since she's sorta having his kid. In a lab. Except she's partially basing her kid on her lover's dead wife's DNA. Which is pretty goddamn twisted if you think about it.

Hmm.

Christ, why does every fanfic I start somehow end up turning into a hundred thousand word epic?

(nice xkcd reference, btw.)